This is a collection of facial expressions we’ve experienced when someone finds out that we’re trans. It’s a study of how our own identities have been developed by lies we believe. This isn't about documenting the receiving of these expressions but of the relationship between offender and the threatened; these are expressions we've learned to turn back on ourselves as a collection of internalized transphobia. The looks are unintentionally archived in our brains and serve as a reminder of how we may be viewed as our identities evolve. Sometimes the looks are subtle, sometimes they're not. They represent skepticism, confusion and disgust. There's also the notion that if we’d just let someone look through us, they could see what or rather, who, was once there. Every look, a subtle shift, a lasting impression. These faces aren’t exact replicas. They’re based on memory which can also be skewed by emotion and imagination. The experiences of these expressions were real, but it’s the retelling of the stories over and over again that has shaped our belief systems. A belief system that is fabricated by memory, sometimes specific and sometimes generalized. Once a self-portrait project, this exploration has brought to light the idea that I’ve been mimicking the behavior I’ve experienced from others by turning these looks back on myself. This forms a mirrored false narrative about my place in the world. While we all grow from different circumstances, the experience is shared.
